450 Conversations with Other Women

“I’m glad I ran into you, glad we saw each other after all this time. I’ve imagined it so often you know, tomorrow I’ll even wonder if it happened at all. I’m glad I ran into you, but somehow I feel like I’m lonelier than before. I dunno, I used to think I could call you. To have lunch, get married, you know, simple as that. The promise of all those high school physics film strips fulfilled…you know spilled milk leaks back into pictures, broken teacups miraculously reassemble. Time really can move in 2 different directions, it doesn’t matter to the universe anyway. Which is to say…I thought everything could still turn out. Now everything means so much…more definite, seems so much more real…seems so much more…final. You know milk once spilled cannot unspill. And a broken tea cup is always a broken teacup. You know it’s funny because everyone thinks they shouldn’t mention you to me. But you know the omission, the omission only makes it worst. I like to hear about you sometimes. I love you. For better or for worst you can take that on your travels.”

He made this clear to her while she was showering and heard nothing. She did consciously.
10 years ago, 10 years later, nothing is gonna change, since there is no returns, no futures.
But my tears still fell down when actually ‘listening’ to the one-night-stand happens between the ex-husband/wife.

He: If I told you I still loved you, that I always loved you, that I loved you to distraction, would you leave him?
She: No.


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